I've heard people talk about naming their alcohol addiction. It is a great idea to give my 'situation' it's own identity, a separate being from the Jeff that I want to be. If I can separate the negative side of my life, and make it something I can see, flip off and tell to "go to hell', it helps me to be able to work on the things that are trying to take me down.
I've heard it called 'the wine witch' or even personal names of our 'alter ego' but I have decided to name my uninvited mental guest Kudzu.
When I looked up the definition of the biggest 'pain in the ass' of invasive weeds, I found.... 'The fastest growing weed may be kudzu, called the “foot-a-night vine” because it literally can grow a foot each day. Imported from Japan in 1876, this vine infests more than 7 million acres throughout the Southeast United States, and has even been found in the Pacific Northwest. It’s known to kill trees, destroy forests, pull down power lines and overwhelm houses. Agronomists say it can take seven to 10 years of repeated herbicide use and cutting and chopping to subdue an infestation.'
There is a line I read that often, 'our troubles sometimes begin with indifference". I am realizing that I am notoriously good at ignoring problems or 'Kudzu's' that I could easily address at the moment that they pop up in my life, but ignore until they begin to spread into a problem that is soooo much bigger than it was.
I have a lot of great advisors, friends and mentors in my recovery, but today I am going to focus on the words so eloquently spoken regarding how I need to deal with issues henceforth. I can no longer let small 'indifferences' grab root and spread. I can no longer fertilize a small 'fixable' situation with alcohol so that it can branch out and take over every part of my life. I have drank over so many issues that could have been solved immediately, easily and permanently, but have tried to bury them beneath booze, only to let them take over my peace, my wellness and my normalcy of life.
My alcohol abuse and all the negatives that come with it, or potentially cause it has a new name, Kudzu! And the only way I can stop Kudzu from over-running my life and stealing me from me is to follow the advice and new personal mantra of the ever so wise Deputy Barney Fife..
We've got to 'Nip it in the Bud!' Nip it! Nip it now, while its nippable, stop it, solve it and deal with it NOW, before it has a chance to grab hold and grow into something that becomes totally unmanageable!
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