Is it Working?
I worry that too many people will make the same mistake that I sometimes make when I truly believe that giving up alcohol, or becoming sober would magically make life wonderful all the time. I sometimes fall into the trap of thinking that if I am having a crappy day, that my sobriety must not be working. Everyone else seems happy all the time, so obviously I must be doing something wrong, or I just don't fully get it yet....
I spoke to a good friend about this and she (Peggi C) said that "the fact that I am not turning to alcohol on those days means that my sobriety IS working". I am learning to face and deal with those days with new coping skills and am creating positives out of them versus just letting them take me down into further self destruction.
Once again, and this is why I share on these pages, I learn so much from others. I think I just always had hoped that every problem that I had in my life would disappear as soon as I removed alcohol. This hope has probably blinded me to what sobriety HAS actually given me. I am now living my life like it was meant to be lived. Sobriety has allowed me to feel the now, and truly live in the moment of not only the good moments, but also the tougher ones. I need to look at both scenarios and realize the incredible blessings that sobriety has given me. I used to cope with those days with alcohol, now I am using ME to cope with them. And the outcome is what I need to focus on.
Tougher days will happen, but in previous years, my drinking compounded them into a rolling snowball of further destruction. Today I am able to accept them as they are, and deal with them in a way that I can move in a positive direction, not the direction I had taken them before.
So thank you Peggi, the tougher moments ARE proof that my sobriety IS working. I guess the proof is how I feel the next day, and that is a damn good feeling!!
Give yourself tomorrow!!